Much as I adored Moana, I think I loved Moana 2 even more. And with the current threats to #DEI (Diversity Equality and Inclusivity) in America, it feels like an especially good time to remind everyone that immigration (yes, I’m biased as a daughter and granddaughter of immigrants and now immigrant myself) is A GOOD THING.
I hope you enjoy this week’s episode and I’d love to hear your thoughts on it and the film. If you’d like to read some of the older Sofa Session posts where I take inspiration from other fictional, animated and historic characters as well as current affairs, you can READ MORE HERE
le grá (with love),
FULL TRANSCRIPT
It's the abundance of diversity. It's not about tolerating. It's about welcoming…
It's about appreciating. It's about supporting. So that is one of my favourite themes and self-care lessons from Moana 2.
Hi, I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and welcome to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast.
I am so excited to be sharing new trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly ideas for you to help you take better care of your Self: that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself, as well as the basic self-care, which we all know can be so challenging at times. I really appreciate you tuning in. If you want a deeper dive, you'll be getting bonus content each week.
If you sign up to the Sole to Soul circle, you can do that for free or from as little as €8 a month. And you can also find more ideas in the book, 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing
Welcome to episode 46 of the Feel Better Every Day podcast.
And while I've done many, many blog posts where I've either written open letters to fictional characters or shared self-care coaching lessons from various films and TV programmes, things that are going on in the news, this is the first podcast I'm doing along those lines.
And it's 10 self-care lessons from Moana 2. So it does include some spoilers, but hopefully in the Greek Chorus kind of way, or Brechtian approach, so it won't actually spoil it.
It's such a lovely film, I don't think anything could spoil it.
But what I'm sharing is so vague, it's not going to ruin any plot lines. But I hope it will encourage you to watch the film, enjoy the film and take inspiration from the film like I have.
#1 Know who you are
Moana repeats, ‘I am Moana.’ And even me, I'm not Moana, but even just saying that I kind of sat up straighter. And I'm 49 years old, but I will admit there have been a few challenging times since I saw Moana 2, where I've stood up straighter and said, ‘I am Evie.’
Try it, whatever your age, just ground, check that the feet are fully on the ground. If they don't reach, put something below them, like maybe a cushion, maybe a bolster, maybe a few cushions. Sit up straight, stand up straight.
‘I am… [whatever your name is].’ Notice how you feel in your body. Notice, yeah, you might feel silly, but also connect with who you are and know that who you are is worthy, is lovable, is good enough, is enough, is not too much.
#2 Recognise that there is always another way
So I also have a theory that Moana has ADHD, based on a theory that people with ADHD moved further from Africa as humans evolved, because the ADHD people in hunter-gatherer societies were needed in terms of scoping out newness, scoping out new ways of being. And Moana, of course, being an explorer, very much did that for her people. So lesson number two from Moana 2 is to recognise that there is always another way.
Whatever's going on for you, however stuck you may be feeling, however impossible the odds stacked against you may feel. And I realise I'm regularly taking inspiration from fictional characters, and in this case an animated character. But it's true, there's always another way.
So think about your situation and look at it from different perspectives. If you are into yoga, you might want to play with one or two poses. Just seeing the room you're normally in from those different perspectives can help.
Or even if you're not, you may want to lie on the ground or sit in a different chair. Look for that other way. Don't give up on what you want or what you're working towards.
#3 Immigration rocks
Number three, and my favourite theme from this film, because unfortunately we live in times where this is such an unusual message to be getting, immigration rocks.
From the very beginning, she's begging to find others. She knows that there must be others out there, and this is a spoiler for the ending, but others do arrive and they are welcomed with open arms because her people recognise that their people all have unique talents and gifts that will complement and will add to what they all can.
It's the abundance of diversity. It's not about tolerating. It's about welcoming.
It's about appreciating. It's about supporting. That is one of my favourite themes and self-care lessons from Moana too.
#4 Being of service and kindness
In everything she does, she's so open-hearted and she's strong. She's adventurous. She's powerful and she's always looking out for the greater good. She's not being selfish. She's being of service.
She's being kind to herself as well as to others. So again, notice in your own life, think of ways in which you might be able to do that for yourself.
#5 Even really, really, REALLY annoying people have gifts
Oh my God, I don't know how she managed on that boat with all those irritable people. But she did. (And again, Evie, it's a cartoon. It's an animation.) But it's worth remembering that we all have so much more in common than we do. Those irritations can be overcome.
And it might be a matter of whether it's your partner, whether it's a friendship, whether it's some colleagues at work, whether whoever it is, if you're in community with someone or people who are annoying you, remember, again, changing your perspective, maybe focusing on their gifts, focusing on what unique talents they bring and how you can support them in bringing more of that out and helping them also focus on the greater good. So you will get out of the nitty gritty grr of it all and keep that focus on what you can accomplish when you work together. This is not about staying in abusive, intolerable situations.
It's about those icky, irritating situations. Hopefully you're not trapped on a boat with people who are being really annoying.
#6 Hurt people hurt people
Another theme, number six, is about there being another misunderstood villain. It was something I loved from the first movie and it's something that I love here as well. The fact that basically, whether it's something you're doing yourself or whether it's something you're facing in the world, it can be helpful to recognise that hurt people hurt people. So I'm not again saying… definitely don't be staying in abusive situations.
Set those boundaries, assert yourself, make yourself safe and do it with love. Do it with compassion for yourself and for others involved, recognising that hurt people hurt people. It's a cliche, but it's true.
And the more we can work with our own pain, the less likely we are to project it out. The more likely we are to be able to hold space to help others heal.
#7 Keep the faith and trust the process
So number seven, keeping the faith and trusting the process.
Moana never gave up on finding other people. And every time she had that awful, awful, awful but funny chicken play a prank on her, she was gracious, much more gracious than I would have been. Again, this is partly why I think she might have ADHD.
I'm not a psychiatrist. I'm not a psychologist. I'm not able to diagnose. And again, she's a fictional character. But I kind of loved how she kept forgetting that the chicken kept doing this and each time she'd fall for it. But she kept the faith. She kept hoping to make contact with others. She didn't give up on it. She didn't think, ‘No one but the chicken is ever going to respond.’
#8 Value what you have to offer
And eventually other humans did respond. So number eight, again, valuing other people's skills and valuing your own skills. Thinking about what you bring to the table and not underestimating it.
Not giving away your bone marrow to be of service too much, but valuing what you bring and giving in that wholehearted way. You're not depleting yourself. You are challenging yourself when needed, but it's all done with grace and with ease and you're looking after yourself through it all.
When I say with grace and with ease, I don't mean to put pressure on yourself to be like a fictional animated character. I just mean to give yourself grace. Let yourself go as easy as possible as you can as you navigate life's challenges.
Again, here, Metta [a Loving Kindness meditation] really helps me.
#9 Transitional objects are not just for babies
Number nine, doesn't matter how old we are, transitional objects can help. They're not just from babies and toddlers.
So they might be a kinaesthetic anchor, something you hold. It might be a crystal. It might be a toy. It might be… Moana used shells that her little sister gave her and she would hold that for courage. She would wear it around her neck. It's something, whatever you're facing, think of something that you can literally hold onto to remind yourself that you're not alone.
And even when you feel you're alone...
#10 Intergenerational healing
So that leads us nicely into number 10, which is remembering that you're not alone to connect with your ancestors in a loving way, to work towards that intergenerational healing of intergenerational trauma. Even if you've had challenging relationships with your more immediate ancestors, and even if you know nothing about that, if you've been adopted or other reasons why you might not know anything about your ancestors.
Imagine yourself supported by a long line of people whose DNA you have within you. You are whoever you are and you carry a part of them. Imagine their pride in all you're accomplishing and all you're dreaming of and let yourself feel that support.
For the deeper dive for Full Moon and Super Moon members this week, we're going to do the Dragon's Tail exercise again to help you really connect with that and embody it and move around with that sense of connection. You might remember it from the Lisa Woodruff episode a few weeks ago, and also it's in the book 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing.
And you can do part of it without, so you can easily join the Sole to Soul Circle if you want to, but you can simply sit and think about where you came from, even if you don't know where you came from and where you come from.
Think about your own life, think about all you've overcome, all the challenges you've faced, all the things that didn't kill you, that might have, as Jessica Jones says, made you stranger, and as Nietzsche said, might have hopefully made you stronger, but recognising that it's time to honour that. To really embody all you've come from, all you've come through, as well as who you have come from. And just notice, again, in your body, how you feel as you think about your parents, if you know your parents and what they went through, your grandparents, maybe some people might be lucky enough to have known their great-grandparents. Think about some of their journeys, some of the stories you know about them.
Moana came from wayfaring people, but that was a few generations before they became landlocked. She reconnected with that in the first film, and she was able to be more fully herself and she was able to save her people. Again, fictional, cartoon, I know, but thinking about what you carry within you and trusting your dreams, trusting your goals, trusting your visions, trusting your impulses, not necessarily acting impulsively, but honouring that what you want is there for a reason, what you crave.
Go see it and let me know what you think
And I hope you enjoy the film if you haven't already seen it. If you have already seen it, let me know what you think. And if you're watching it again, or you are watching it for the first time, again, let me know what you think. And if I missed any lessons you would like to add.
Thank you for listening. Next week, we’re making self care more accessible to everyone by working with the idea of a dopamenu. So creating a way in which you can access something, even when you don't have energy or when you have a lot of time or a little time. It's about helping to make those decisions much easier and I can't wait to share it with you.
If you'd like to get it straight to your inbox, do subscribe or follow via your favourite podcasting app or YouTube or the Substack through the Sole to Soul Circle. And if you are a member of the Sole to Soul Circle, look out for your bonus content tomorrow and Thursday for your deeper dive and more.
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